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Local Radio Owner Jailed for being Too Smart and Too Good Looking

4/1/2017

 
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All suspects are presumed innocent until proven guilty in a court of law.

A local radio station owner was arrested Saturday around 1:00 pm immediately after his radio program ended.   Tim Radford, age 44, of Murphy, NC states that he was minding his own business when local law enforcement forced their way into the WKRK studio arresting him on charges of being "too smart and too good looking."

It's true that Radford has battled these problems all his life, but did not realize it was a crime to be that gifted.   Radford states, "so that I don't bother others with these issues, I just stayed locked inside a studio trying to not to hurt anyone.  I try to be friendly so that people will like me.  Everyone wants to be super attractive and smart, but they don't realize what a curse it can be.  I urge everyone to please just try to be average and fit in with others."

Radford does possess an IQ close to those of Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking, but once again argued that such a thing should not be a reason to arrest someone.   

Radford is being held on a $2,000,000 secured bond as he is a tremendous flight risk.

The arresting officer stated, "This is the kind of thing that cannot be tolerated in our community and we will not rest until we see this monster do his time in jail."

If you have read down this far, I'm hoping that you have figured out that this is an April Fool's joke and not an actual news story.   

Have a great weekend and enjoy the sunshine!  -Tim

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